Mark

Mark is enjoying some hot chocolate and marshmallows tonight. Ready to see the kids in the morning!

Press On

As my blogging mood has changed from being in a depressive state to bringing laughter and cheer from my kids, I thought about deleting some of my old posts.  I got a lot of ridicule for my past posts, with, perhaps some of the most memorable words being "delete your blog and buy a notebook."
But, I didn't.
If something told me to blog, I did.  It felt good at the time for some of my feelings to be out in the open, when I had no one to really listen.
Now I am being showed why I kept typing away through all my troubles and turmoil.  I have received private messages that say:
"just read your blog! I love it! you completely open your feelings and talk about your struggles...thank you for sharing...especially the 2010 picture one...makes me think about my faith, my family, and friends"
and "read part of your blog about misery... I feel that is exactly what I'm going through right now. Made me feel better knowing that other people have those feelings and are doing so great later. thank you for your honesty."

It brings tears to my eyes when I consider the struggles I had, and some that I still do have.  Obviously, my parent's divorce is one of the major factors, as well as the death of two good friends, and other tragic losses of nearby communities.
It also moves me that I might be helping others through their struggles, or at least showing them that it will be okay in the end.
The circumstance can vary, but, depression happens.  Sometimes acutely, sometimes chronically. All I have to say is: do whatcha gotta do to (healthily) get through it.

This brings me to one of my favorite bible verses:
"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."   
Philippians 3:12-14

Good night Mark

Mark is ready for bed and so am I!

The adventures of Mark

The kids are still having fun with Mark (our elf). Even Nolan is getting into it now... "Where MARK?" All of our family and friends have been asking Kyla about it, and she's usually not afraid to explain who he is and what his job is and where he's hiding that day.

Yesterday morning, he delivered a gift to both Kyla and Nolan because they've been being good and even stayed in their bed all night! He picked these bags up from the North Pole.

Here's what was in their gift bags... a writing tablet and a foam letter.

 

And this is what happens when a guy gets involved with the Elf on a Shelf. Greg build him a hang glider last night!

Greg and I might be having as much fun as the kids  ;)

Mark

I was all excited about "elf on a shelf". It's fun, creative, and magical!

While my kids were out to a movie with my mom, I planted the elf and his book on top of our TV stand. The kids got home and after a couple hours passed, no one noticed. So, finally I said "where'd that elf and book come from?!!" Kyla asked if I bought it, I said "No." (I lied).
We read the book, and as instructed, Kyla gave him a name-- "Mark." I don't know where she got that name from, but our Elf's name is Mark.
We continued to read, and when we got to the part about he Elf being able to fly to the North Pole she started crying. I was confused. Then she said, "if we touch him, he comes to life??!!"
She slightly miss understood some of the story, but it dawned on me that she had visions of this creepy little elf wandering around our house. My sister put it best, "like a Christmas version of Chucky."  Hahaha!
I reassured Kyla that he only can move when everyone is sleeping. Then I reiterated that all kids have to be good, because "Mark" reports back to the North Pole every night to tell Santa if you've been naught or nice.
Then came a bazillion questions, like how he got in the house, how he gets to the North Pole, how he can see us when we're in the kitchen, how he can talk to Santa, why he's so small, how he makes the toys...
I think she likes Mark after all. Today, he hid in the ceiling fan and we didn't experience any tears.
As for Nolan, I don't think he gives a hoot about a stupid elf in our house!
Click here for a video of Kyla discussing the elf!

The Dreaded Question

Tonight, the question was asked. The question that I knew would come from my daughter, but I have been dreading for nearly three years.

"If Gramma is your mom and Papa is your dad, then why don't they live together?"
The question came out of no where, but the answer came easy, "They used to be married, but now they're not."
And then came an, almost more complicated, question, "And now Papa is married to Jean?"
I wasn't going to lie,"Papa and Jean are not married."
"Then why do they live together?"
"Because sometimes people do things, even if it doesn't make God happy. But, we just need to pray about it."
"We pray for them to get married?"
I thought for just a second, then said.... "Yes, I think that would make God and mommy happy."

10,000 Reasons

I've never minded going to church. I've always loved singing the songs, and visiting with other people. But, as a child, I always wondered when the preacher would start making sense. I would get bored and my mind would wander... Sometimes my mind still does wander, but God's word makes more and more sense to me all the time.
Our Pastor, at Fist CRC in Sioux Falls, has been preaching on the 10 Commandments for the last several weeks. It's actually been really exciting for me. I was taught the 10 Commandments early in life- mostly being told to memorize them and their simple meanings, but I don't know if I've ever studied them deeper.
This morning the sermon was about the 9th Commandment- "You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor" (Exodus 20:16).
Why is it so satisfying to the human race to talk about each other? I am totally guilty of the "did-you-hears" and the "did-you-knows". I understand that a person may be genuinely concerned, but there is a fine line between concern and gossip. I need to work on avoiding gossip, judgment and labeling people-- don't we all need to work on this?

I also want to share a song that was sung after a baby's baptism this morning. Songs almost always have an impact on me. Play me any song, and I have a memory connected to it. This song brings me back to the weekend that our friend, Nick, was living his last hours on this earth--

 

As I sat in the pew, a tear trickled down my face, and I was reminded- that despite all the evil and sadness in this world, that even though friends may die, families may break, and communities get hurt- there are so many reasons to keep living, to keep trusting God, and to stay strong in faith. Why give up?